The moment I posted about this class, I received a lot, a lot of charged messages. Most of them were positively charged, expressing gratitude for putting this together because, if you're a parent, you know this is missing from the collective dialogue/knowledge exchange. I also received a lot of charged messages about my use of the word "intact."
I expected it; it's inevitable, and I understand that it's not easy or comfortable to reckon with the reality that when something from our bodies is altered, severed, or removed, intentionally or not, our bodies are no longer intact.
My ears are no longer intact from multiple piercings; my belly button is also not intact. My perineum, for that matter, after birth, is no longer intact either.
I'm here to speak frankly and to orient us to reality. When the decision to circumcise a child is made, their foreskin, an integral physiological part of the male genitalia, is removed, and the penis is no longer intact.
The reality is that depending on where you are in the world, the values, customs, religious beliefs, and socio-cultural standards inform the decision for parents to choose circumcision or not.
I grew up in a culture where it is not common. It wasn't until I arrived in the U.S. that I realized it was a thing and that young tween-teen boys, probably grown men too, would tease and shame the uncircumcised ones.
From my personal point of truth, it's barbaric. It's genital mutilation. And there's a very big difference between accepting that our bodies are not intact because of decisions we made via our own willpower and choice and the nervous system's deep reckoning of accepting that we are not intact because of a procedure that was forced upon us in one of our most vulnerable and delicate times, infancy. So I get the charged, emotional responses.
I'm not really here to debate my point of truth. I know there are plenty of people out there who disagree with me.
It really isn't about me or my opinions, and this post and subsequent class are not about the reality of the ripple effect that circumcision has on society... (I may pick up on this later).
This space is about the reality that there is so much amnesia and a complete broken telephone on the transmissions about how our baby boys' physiologies evolve and how to care for them, and I wasn't even aware until I was living it.
As I write this, my brain is firing off all the neural connections between our disconnect regarding male physiology and the art of tending to it, as well as the rampant imbalance in the male collective... but I'm going to rein it in and stay on course.
When my son was born, I cloth diapered him sometimes, but mainly I left him diaper-free. Something about wrapping him up felt unnatural to me, especially since it was summer and hot. I am also not grossed out by baby poop and pee; it cleans easily. For the most part, I was entirely entranced by him and therefore acutely aware of when he was about to go. I would slip a linen diaper insert under him so it wouldn't get on the bed and such.
This led me to intuitively understand a lot of things:
Babies communicate; we just have to be willing to get into more expansive brain-wave states and attune to their language. They're going to express when they have to go.
The idea of being grossed out by bodily processes, fluids, and baby excrement is anti-mammalian. It's a cultural conditioning that severs us from our primal instincts, and we miss out on valuable insight and information that's transmitted by observing and tending to them.
A male infant's foreskin does not peel back right away. It has its unique physiologic evolution... but what is it?
Am I supposed to help it peel back? How do I clean it? It looks a little red. Maybe it's just pink? Is this normal? Is it infected? It doesn't seem to hurt or bother him...
Many questions came up for me, realizing that since I don't have a penis, younger male siblings whom I had to care for, or any reference of intact penis care beyond 6 weeks postpartum (when I usually say goodbye to families whose pregnancy and birth I've accompanied), and none of these families had ever reached out with such questions, I simply didn't have a point of orientation to this physiologic realm.
Naturally, I asked my husband, "Do you remember when your foreskin peeled back?" "Did it hurt?" "Has it ever been infected?" "Do you remember how your mom washed or bathed you?"
He doesn't recall or have any memory of any of it. It's always been fine, no problems, infections, etc. His hygiene has always been intuitive, organic... and he didn't have much to offer in terms of when the foreskin peeled back, which led me to infer that it happens in health before puberty and in a way that is not painful or alarming, just an occurrence that happens on any regular day.
All of this sparked my curiosity. I am both an intuitive activator, sourcing information via observation and from the cellular memory of my body, and I am an avid researcher. Collecting scientific information via medical journals, textbooks old and new, and an anecdotal researcher, meaning, I ask people about their experiences and integrate their stories and lived realities.
That is what I will be offering in this class. I synergy of all of the above, complimented with some foundational male reproductive anatomy & physiology. The intention is to empower, illuminate and create a resource for families, to initiate a collective dialogue and to reweave the transmissions of male physiologic care through the generations.
I will cover:
Foundational Male Anatomy & Physiology.
Function of the foreskin and its role in sexual-reproductive health.
Orientation to the physiologic changes from infancy to toddlerhood.
Physiology and organic timeline of foreskin retraction.
Natural separation of the foreskin and its physical, energetic and spiritual significance.
Optimal hygiene. Examples of cleansing routines and methods.
Optimal diapering & ways to approach non-diapering.
Identification of typical signs of healthy growth and development.
Common variations in the appearance of the uncircumcised penis during infancy and toddlerhood.
Normal bodily secretions and their characteristics.
Tips for avoiding irritation and potential infections.
Consent & honoring our children’s bodies.
The free live class will be on June 23, 2023 at 4pm EST (NYC time) on ZOOM. The recording will be available for purchase on www.seedtobodycare.com.
You will receive the link to the live zoom class the day prior to our class. In the meantime, if you have questions or personal stories you’d like to share, please do, I welcome them.
Thanks for being here…excited to be growing and nurturing this space.
HERE IS THE CLASS FOR ALL PAID SUBSCRIBERS